Wednesday, July 20, 2011


the hawa I admire
wearing her attire hiding her figure, 
thus, curbing my desire.. 

The hawa I desire
fearing the (hell) Fire 
is diligent in her prayers 
for the rewards of life hereafter...

The hawa I encounter
is beyond bother 
with the keen race 
to beautify the face! 

The hawa I ask 
from dawn to dusk 
is busy with ALLAH 
murmuring, subhan'allah, subhan'allah, subhana'allah 

The hawa I observe
certainly deserves 
better respect 
than what she expects

The hawa I listen 
is very, very stern 
for her it is a must
to control one's lust

The hawa I met 
boasting her beauty
most probably by surgery? 
but does she know it is all temporary? 

Hence, the hawa
I know is advised to follow
the sunnah of our beloved Rasulullah
from head to toe.... 

The hawaI judge 
often bears a grudge
EQUALITY, she requests (or rather protests) 
but please bear in mind ALLAH'S inquest! 

The hawa I hurt (by this article)
please do not curse or smut 
for it is better I warned before all is gone.... 

Teen Love ??

The day outside at lunch looked rather nice
So I take a walk in the park to get some excercise

When much to my surprise I see a hijabi and a guy
Committing zina openly, right under the open sky

As I walk along the path they cease with shame
After I have passed they continue all the same

Its sad though, they stopped for only human me
Yet remain aloof of the All-Seeing, Allah Almighty

Whom we will have to answer to on Judgement day
When each of our actions He will survey

The decision, to jannah or jahannam, will take place
Ask yourself now, which one is it that you chase?

You fool yourself that this maybe love
Ask them to marry and see how you get the shove

For it is only lust at your tender age
And with the devil you both engage

So stop these shenanigans and open your eyes
The true purpose of life come to realise

Yourself, from sins and evil of zina do save
Before its too late and you are already in the grave

Stop, turn to Allah and sincerely repent
Mend your ways and follow Jannah's scent!

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Sky is Crying.. Are You ??

“Why can’t I cry?” I said to myself on the sajadah, longing for those tiny droplets to run free from my eyes. But it seems impossible to do so, just impossible. I’ve tried but it’s still not working.

“Why? Why it is so hard?” I stood up from where I sat and went to the mirror to see myself. Through the reflection of the mirror I see the body Allah has borrowed for me. I tried again crying in front of the mirror wanting to witness myself crying. But no. No physical change. No sad face. No heart pumping hard. No nothing. Just my old stiff face full of ignorance. 19 years of ignorance? Maybe. It freaks me out becoming the owner of a dark rusty heart.

Why am I craving so much for just crying? Isn’t crying a sign of weakness? Because only women cry and men don’t? If men cry they are not macho anymore? No no no!
I have a strong desire to cry because crying makes me strong.

Crying is a symbol of weakness?

Everyone has the experience of crying, even the most stone hearted thugs in the world have experienced crying; at least when they were babies, because crying is a gift from Allah for all.
You may retort to me, ‘That guy have not cried all his life’, well I’ll tell you, only abnormal people do not cry. I assure you that every doctor will feel strange if a new born baby have no ability to cry and try their best to make the baby cry. This is because crying is not only limited to feeling sad, but it has a strong relation to the feeling of happy and relief as well. If a baby only cries when feeling sad, that baby is not normal.
Many people claim that crying is a “sign of weakness” or “only women cries” or “men do not” or “childish”. That’s why men will control their emotional state so that they will not look “weak” as they say. How do I know? Because I am a man. As if, when a man cries, people will see a sign of “I am weak. Don’t go near me” or “FYI[1], I’m a woman” or “I’m a little kid” on that persons head. Bear in mind, men are also humans who are created by Allah who; after sharing their problems with someone, will feel peace and relief at heart. So, if a guy cries, that’s not what we call weakness but, to me, as a guy, I will feel relief because if not, I’ll feel bombarded with problems, if I don’t cry, at least I my eyes will be brimming with tears after a nice long pep talk.

Allah has talk about significance of crying many times in the Quran. Allah actually loves those who cry for the sake of Him:

“And they fall upon their faces weeping, and the Qur’an increases them in humble submission” al-Isra’: 109.

Crying also is stated in hadith as those who cry for the sake of Allah is guaranteed paradise:

Narrated Abu Huraira:

The Prophet said, “Seven (people) will be shaded by Allah by His Shade on the Day of Resurrection when there will be no shade except His Shade. (They will be), a just ruler, a young man who has been brought up in the worship of Allah, a man who remembers Allah in seclusion and his eyes are then flooded with tears, a man whose heart is attached to mosques (offers his compulsory congregational prayers in the mosque), two men who love each other for Allah’s Sake, a man who is called by a charming lady of noble birth to commit illegal sexual intercourse with her, and he says, ‘I am afraid of Allah,’ and (finally), a man who gives in charity so secretly that his left hand does not know what his right hand has given.”[2]

It is so easy to enter Jannah! Just shed your tears only for Allah!

Crying is a form of cure

The goal of your life is not crying but to attain blessings from Allah. We don’t live to cry but we cry to achieve our ultimate goal. So by crying we will feel a spiritual relief in us.

Other than that crying is also a form of medication. It has its own medical qualities for us to prosper. By crying, not only our sick heart will be cured, diseases related to eyes can also be prevented.

You might wonder what fact proves the theory of crying is a form of cure. Well I’ll share you one. According to the research done by Dr. William Frey; the author of Crying: The Mystery of Tears (Harper & Row), he claims that “Weeping is the body’s response to overload of stress related chemicals and actually helps eliminate toxins.” If we refrain ourselves from crying when the situation needs us to cry, then, we are opening doors for sickness to take control of our body.

He reported to then the NEWS, “The University of Minnesota Psychiatrist and Chemist have found that tears contain hormones related to emotional upset and pain relief. They are known to be released known to be released from the pituitary gland during stress.”

And my advice is what he once said “We should use crying to make us better able to deal with the stress in our environment.”

I may not be a doctor nor a person majoring in allied health (because my major is English :p) but that will not stop me from conveying the truth.

How to cry?

As Muslims we are actually asked to fear Allah. And the side effects of fearing Allah are like crying, our hearts tremble etc.  Fearing Allah is not the same as we afraid of ghosts. When we are afraid of ghosts we tend to go away from these (terrifying? not so la) creatures, but when we fear Allah, we are actually going near to Him. Afraid of the dark is normal in our lives, because the mass media plays an important role in doing so, but do we really fear Allah? That’s the question we need to answer.

They prophet Muhammad PBUH can easily broke into tears:

‘Abdullah (b. Mas’ud) reported: The Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon (him) asked me to recite the Qur’an. He said: Messenger of Allah, (how) should I recite to you whereas it has been sent down to you? He (the Holy Prophet) said: I desire to hear it from someone else. So I recited Surat al-Nisa’ till I reached the verse: How then shall it be when We shall bring from every people a witness and bring you against them as a witness?” (verse 41). I lifted my head or a person touched me in my side, and so I lifted my head and saw his tears falling (from the Holy Prophet’s eyes).[3]

Even the prophet who was guaranteed Jannah when hears verses of Allah, he will cry.

So how to cry then?

There once a time when a person asked my Xifu, Cikgu Azmi Bahari or known as Abu Umar, on how to cry. Abu Umar seems very easy to shed tears. So Abu Umar answered back, not in the exact wordings, he said that it may be difficult for starters. But as we increase our Iman (faith) and Taqwa (Fear of Allah) gradually, and penetrate our heart slowly, we will cry. In order for us to cry for the sake of Allah is; it actually goes parallel with our Iman and Taqwa. We don’t try to increase, and then our cry is nothing. If our intention is not clear only for Allah, then our cry is not sincere.

Try to let it all go

I am a sentimental person. So when I am in the mood of something I’ll write a poem or short story. So I’ll share with you a time when I wanted to cry so badly but I couldn’t, I just literally can’t. I don’t know why. And I’m so jealous of my friend Abdul Qowy who once said to me “My emotional state is like the sky, whenever it rains, I’ll cry, whenever it is cloudy, I’ll feel gloomy. And whenever it shines, I feel so happy. I just don’t know why I am like that.”

The moment he said that to me one day, you know what I said in my heart, “Rain, storm or shine, I’ll just be the same old guy. Crying is so hard for me. Huh.”

The Sky is crying, are you?

*This is my poem inspired by Harga Hujan itu by Hilal Asyraf and Signs by Boona Mohammed.

As I gaze towards the sky,
it makes me wonder why,
why is the sky turning cloudy?
Is the sky feeling gloomy?

“Oh, it is raining outside” says my little heart,
“Again?” As the rain starts to depart,
trillions of tiny droplets of water,
dashing through the atmosphere,
colliding fiercely onto the terrain,
making typical sounds of the rain.

It has been raining for days,
“Why it has to rain?” my heart says,
my days are filled with water,
if not a drizzle, it may be a downpour or even a thunder.

Scary isn’t it when it rains?
Deaths occurs more than usual,
accidents happen due to slippery roads,
people are not happy as toads,
they say “Rain rain, go away”,
“come back in another day.”

We forgot to start thinking,
the sky is actually crying,
we think we are too good to be true,
we forgot to implement Surah Al-Baqarah: 82,
we fulfilled our lives with laughs and sins,
transgressing bounds with defiant grins.

But this world is full of signs,
from the moon and the skies,
from the bees and the bugs,
makes it need to look up,
and question what’s up.

“Why you deal with this stuff?!”,
“When your spirits a quest!”,
but like thunder this question struck,
all the signs that were sent,
they finally make sense,
you feel the torment,
so you need to repent,
but your heart is cement.

So cry! Soften your heart!
Cry in your tahajjud! Cry for Allah!
Make the repentance your start!

Let it all go because after every rainfall must come a rainbow. Don’t hold back! Let your feelings run through your tears. Insya Allah, He will be your cure!

Conclusion: Let us cry!

Tears can afflict different impacts on people. People are sometimes weakened and strengthen due to weeping. We feel week because the reason we cry is not because of Allah. But if the sole reason we broke into tears is Allah, then I can assure you your tears are tears of strength. It creates a strong drive in your heart.

Well, let us shed our tears only for Allah. Melt down all your egos and make that cry.

We are fortunate to have crying a sunnah and at the same time good for our spiritual and physical health. Other people cry only for health and not accepted as a good deed.
But remember; don’t cry because your boyfriend left you, 
but because Allah loves you!

I Like Your Hijab

I like your hijab. It’s such a simple phrase, only four words. I like your hijab because it—though I have not felt it—seems to be made of silk. It lays perfectly and frames your face; it brings out the dark eyes you try so desperately to hide from the class. I actually like all of your hijabs, though I don’t know how many you have, but you seem to have a few. I imagine an entire closet filled with them hanging on hangers. I imagine you pick the color to match your mood for the day. There is the one that is so deeply red, it borders on crimson. I wonder what that one says about you: that you loved or have been loved? Then there is the floral one, wrapped so the flower — do they have orchids in Iraq? — is placed right over the ear. That one says, Today, I’m really feeling nature. The black one says, I, too, feel pain sometimes. The silk doesn’t miss an inch. The strands of hair near the border of your scalp struggle to crawl out of view. In a world where so many things seem marked by their instability, your hijabs are held together with only the strength of one or two pins—a held constant in the chaos of the grander scheme of things.

But I can never tell you this. Yes, we’ve chatted before. I once said, Yes, it is in fact raining. You once said, Where did you get the tea? I said, Over there, to the left. I think that might be the extent of our dialogue. Of course it seems like I run the risk of offending you by equating your hijab to a mood ring. I don’t really mean it like that. Though I’m not sure how exactly I do mean it, and I’m perfectly willing to admit that maybe I’m searching for some deeper meaning in what should first and foremost be a religious symbol. That would by my own fault, I guess, not yours. I just think they are really beautiful.

Then I wonder why. Do I think they are beautiful in themselves? Are they beautiful because they bring out your face, in which case, the beauty of your face is mediated by the hijab? Does that mean that I actually think your face is beautiful and not the hijab? Or do I actually think the hijab is beautiful for what it represents? Can a mimetic representation be inherently beautiful or do we project beauty onto it?
It is so very hard to think of beauty in this way, let alone speak of it. In a world where a piece of cloth can cause so much political debate, these questions have a bittersweet quality to them.

You and I cannot speak of it though. We are separated by religion and gender. For the first time in my life, such a separation strikes me. Though we are united in the same seminar setting, we are essentially from different worlds.As a man, feels like I would be insulting you if I complimented your hijab, let alone made eye contact with you. I know that the hijab is meant to preemptively stop lustful urges in men, from acknowledging the beauty of the female form and the need to embody a sense of purity. Hair represents beauty in so many cultures, and from what I understand, only your future husband will be permitted to look.

We may not be able to speak of it, so I will just write you this letter. It amazes me that four words could potentially be so loaded. I like your hijab. And I hope that’s okay.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Titisan Air Mata

Tidak semua tangisan itu negatif dan tidak semua insan yang menangis itu lemah.

Bilakah tangisan ini membawa erti kekuatan dan kehebatan?

1.         Menangis kerana rasa cinta dan takut kepada Allah
2.         Menangis kerana menginsafi kelemahan diri dan ahli keluarga dan berusaha untuk memperbaikinya.
3.         Menangis apabila melihat saudara seaqidah dizalimi dan berusaha untuk membantu.
4.         Menangis apabila melihat tatasusila umat Islam yang telah melampau.
5.         Menangis kerana berasa syukur dengan rahmat Allah yang terlalu banyak walaupun dirinya ditimpa bencana
6.         Menangis kerana menyesali dosa dan menyedari kesilapannya
7.         Menangis apabila dia menemui kebenaran setelah sekian lama hanyut di dalam kesesatan.

Tangisan-tangisan ini adalah kehebatan kerana orang yang menitiskan air matanya kerana Allah, adalah orang yang cukup tinggi rasa keimanan dan taqwanya seperti yang ditunjukkan melalui sabda Rasulullah yang telah diriwayatkan oleh Abu Hurairah r.a,

"Tidak akan masuk neraka seorang laki-laki yang menangis kerana takut pada Allah Swt. sehingga air susu kembali masuk ke dalam puting..." (H.R Tirmidzi)

Pada satu ketika Rasulullah saw. berkhutbah di hadapan para sahabat, beliau bersabda," Seandainya kalian mengetahui apa yang aku ketahui sungguh kalian akan sedikit tertawa dan banyak menangis." Kemudian para sahabat menutup wajah mereka dan mereka menangis. (Muttafaq 'Alaihi)

Pada suatu hari Rasulullah saw telah mendengar seorang sahabat Baginda yang sedang membaca al Quran. Apabila sampai ke ayat yang bermaksud:

"Maka apabila langit terbelah dan menjadi merah seperti kulit yang merah" Surah ar Rahman – 37

Bulu roma si pembaca itu berdiri tegak dan dia menangis tersedu-sedu sambil bertanya:"Aduh, apakah yang akan berlaku pada diriku apabila langit terbelah? Malang sungguh nasibku ini." Rasulullah saw berkata kepadanya:" Tangisanmu telah menyebabkan para malaikat menangis bersama-sama."

Jawapan yang sama telah diberikan oleh Rasulullah saw kepada seorang Ansar yang duduk menangis selepas menunaikan sembahyang Tahajjud.

Abdullah bin Rawahah telah menangis pada suatu hari. Isterinya melihat keadaannya turut menangis bersama-sama, dia bertanya kepada isterinya itu:"Mengapa kamu menangis?" Kata Abdullah:"Apabila aku teringat yang aku terpaksa menyeberangi neraka melalui titian sirat, aku menangis."Aku tidak tahu sama ada aku akan berjaya menyeberanginya atau tidak."

Subhanallah, kehebatan yang terserlah dengan linangan air mata yang membuktikan kekuatan seseorang insan.

Malah di antara tanda-tanda yang menunjukkan seseorang ini keras hatinya ialah apabila dia sukar untuk menangis di hadapan Ilahi.

Bilakah kali terakhir daku menitiskan air mata keranaMu ya Ilahi?

Where is this feeling ??

I’ve been crying for so long
Since the day I realized-your gone.
Yes I tried to stay strong
But everything I do seems...wrong

You gave me ease
You gave me peace
You gave me everything that I ever pleased

But now your gone and I’m alone
You’ve packed up, brushed up, all your belongings
You’ve left without goodbye
On to a beautiful journey

Now I feel empty
There’s something missing inside of me
You’ve left me here in misery
Whilst your exploring happily

What did I do to make you go?
You watched me struggle you watched me grow
But now your gone
And left me to move on
Without you?

Who are you? What are you?
You’re my IMAAN!
Scrunched up like a worn out can
Thirsty like a dried up dam
You were my Warner.
But I betrayed you
Left you rotting in the corner!

You built up the strength to get up and go
But for revenge you left with my soul
Leaving me blind deaf and dumb like the kafiroon
Not realizing judgement day is upon us soon

But now I feel different- something deep
My heart feels restless- it can’t get no sleep
I’m like little Bo Peep
Searching for my precious sheep

We’re meant to be together
Forever and ever
Me and my Imaan
The only way to gain true Ihsan
I need to find you
Wherever you are
Whether your on Earth
Or further than the stars

Alhamdulillah I’ve got my eyesight back
So I’m guessing I’m on the right track
I’m seeing this Dunya for what its really worth
Hypocrisy, democracy
Suicides and bomb attacks
Well you know what? No thanks!

I’ve walked to Allah hoping that  He’ll run to me
Trust me-being lost ain’t no fun
So I’m hoping on this journey I’ll reunite with my Imaan
Say sorry for the idiot that I am

I’m praying that I’ll reunite with my soul
Once and for all
Discover true Islam
Not with its sects and groups and corrupted scam

No TRUE Islam
Like Allah orders in the Quran
Like Rasulullah(s.a.w) showed
That’s that way its suppose to be done

In Allah I gotta confide
Read and understand His Quran
They say 'Imaan is like an airplane ride
The higher up you go
The smaller the things on Earth look.'